You can make a difference for yourself

The average person is never ever happy or satisfied with his/ her own life. The prime reason for this is their boredom with the routine, their inability to comprehend the value of their contribution to the profession they are in and of course due to man’s inherent weakness to compare and get jealous or envious. What is not really apparent is that human beings also do not want to move away from their existing comfort zone even if that is apparently merely providing subsistence. This is because any change would involve a certain amount of pain; be it adapting to a new environment, the uncertainty of the future or the fear of falling from the frying pan into the fire. Ironically, without change growth is not possible and as a result we prefer to remain stunted rather than venture into the unknown. Imagine if all the fears that we now experience had begun in childhood; we would never have learnt to walk for fear of falling, never learnt to write for fear of being untidy, never learnt to cycle or swim for fear of hurt and injury.

So how do we break out of the cycle of worry, anxiety, fear and frustration that many of us find ourselves in?

Tweak our attitude – Start by focusing on what you are blessed with. Move on to thinking about your personal achievements and the appreciation you have received over the years. Now that you have a lot to be grateful for, move your attention to having bigger dreams, setting loftier goals and mapping out a road map to attain your goal. You will now be having larger self belief and a very positive attitude towards the future.

Visualize the possibilities – At various times in our growing up years we would have had varied interests, dreams, hopes and passions. For a variety of reasons we may have let go of many of our dreams and passions to become more pragmatic and make a more logical choice for our future. Yet, there is ample scope to weave in our dreams, hopes, interests into our life and possibly even into our profession. The trick lies in visualizing how we can still pursue our first love and integrate it into what we do. E.g you love football but today you are a software engineer. You can still see yourself playing for decent team on weekends or you could be coaching school kids in the evenings or weekends or you could develop software that could prove useful to aspiring footballers.

Venture out with faith – Perhaps most of you reading this so far, would have already concluded that visualizing possibilities is difficult but believing that it can be executed is impossible. Everything is possible if you are passionate enough to take the risks and attempt it. You will take the risk only when you start believing that you can attain it. The most important step is the first step; starting out with faith and hope. Most of us kill our ideas without even pondering over it. Remember all progress was made by individuals who believed in themselves and set the tone for others to emulate.

Be open to feedback – Listening is the bedrock of learning. Doing is essential but ensuring that you are doing the right things and doing it right is the only way to succeed. It is important therefore to keep ones eyes and ears open to comments, observations, suggestions, caution and encouragement that people around will make. There is wisdom in all these comments; some are constructive suggestions, others critical, some foolish and a few insightful. The wise man will profit from all these feedback if we listen carefully and keep an open mind whilst evaluating the relative merit of the suggestions.

Keep the goal in mind – If you want to make a difference to your life constantly focus on it. If you take your mind of the goal then the change you seek will be painful and the growth you covet excruciatingly painful too. It is like beginning to work out to keep in shape. The muscles will be inflexible, the body too rigid, the breathing very labored, the discipline too demanding. Time and time again one would be hoping to see some miraculous change but alas unless one keeps up with the rigors continuously, the change will never come about. To keep you going one would have to imagine the end result as the goal to be achieved. In the same way if you want to make a difference to your boring, monotonous and insipid life imagine the passionate, interesting and fast paced life first. Now set about doing all that is needed to attain it. If you have to go back to upgrading your education do it; if you have to sacrifice something major just do it; if you have to earn the wrath of well wishers and friends still do it; after all it is your life that you want to change and make a difference,

Try these:

• List out 1 major change you plan to bring about in each of the following areas of your life; your personality / work / relationships / finances / lifestyle
• Choose from any one of the following options or add one of your own that you will ensure that you get really skilled in the next 6 months

Chef / Magician / Tour guide / Dog trainer / Maths or Music teacher / Counselor / Writer

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